I'm through with "...happily ever after."

All of the greatest fairy tales begin with "Once upon a time..." and end with "...happily ever after." How would you feel if I told you all of those fantasies are wrong?

I admit I've gone through most of my life with a "happily ever after" mentality. When I was little I wanted to be bigger. When I was 15 I wanted to be 16 so I could have my driver's license and drive the Volkswagen Bug my dad got for my first car. I would go to his work and drive for hours in circles around the buildings and through the parking lots, just waiting for the day I could finally take it out on the road.

When I turned 16, that wasn't good enough and I looked forward to 18. When I turned 18 I could vote and I could move out of my parent's house and I could go to college. Once I got to college and found out that working and going to school full-time and being out on my own was sort of a drag, I wished I was back at home where I could still be a kid. When I moved back, I couldn't wait to be on my own again.

All of us live our lives with similar patterns. Rarely are we content with what we have, always wanting something different, something we foresee as being better. "If only the kids were older, we could travel the country." "Once I retire I can spend all my time golfing." "If only my husband were finished with school." "If only we made more money." "If only..."

While I was in the dating scene wasting my time with guys who weren't nearly good enough for me. I kissed a lot of toads because I had some ridiculous idea that one of them could actually turn into a frog. Still, I kept hoping that my knight in shining armor would ride up on his white horse and carry me off into the sunset. Because that's what we teach ourselves when we read these fantasies, right?

I didn't picture my knight driving up in a faded gray Pontiac Le Mans; where was this white horse I'd heard so much about? But nevertheless he was the prince I had been waiting for all my life. How sad it would have been if I'd been like the other girls in his life who let him slip away because they were too busy looking for someone or something better? I'm glad they were wicked step-sisters instead of princesses.

Our life isn't always a fairytale, it's far from perfect. We do our fair share of wishing away. I work an hour away, so I spend half of my time somewhere else. He works and goes to school full time and our schedules are completely opposite. Even as I'm typing this, he's in the other room fast asleep because he works mornings and I'm currently working graveyards.

Heavenly likes to tell me that it is only for a little while, once he's done with college it will be better, once he is working for an agency we'll have more time together. But we both know it's not true because we both know that's not true. I keep thinking we'll be happier when we finally get pregnant and finally have a baby. But I know we'll never get back the relationship we have right now.

And so I've decided that I'm over "happily ever after," I'm finished looking toward the future for the happiness that surrounds me each and every day. If you're not happy now, you'll have no happily ever after! And so I'm enjoying that when we're home it's just the two of us. And I'm enjoying that we can go on a date without calling a babysitter. When I've been at work and I finally come home after 3 days or 4, I don't waste my time complaining about the time that we're apart. I make the most of the time that we're together. I'm choosing happiness now and laughing at happily ever after.

"You pile up enough tomorrows, and you'll find you've collected a lot of empty yesterdays." -The Music Man

Decide today. Choose happiness now, stop wasting your time on "...happily ever after."